About Sara
by saralover
Summary: michael's in prison,he falls in love with sara but she's keeping something from him
1. silence gets us nowhere

Michael had noticed Sara was growing more silent with each passing day She wasn't smiling anymore. Avoiding his eyes.

She sat behind her desk, scribbling something on his chart Her beautiful face was paler than usual, she'd lost weight and there were heavy bags under her eyes "Sara"  
She turned her head toward him slightly, to let him know, he had her attention But she didn't let him see her eyes "Hmm"  
His voice was groggy and soft "How are you"  
Her voice was dishonest, as she was desperate to not let it covey her true emotions "Fine"  
She got up out of her chair and pulled up the privacy curtain to examine his burn He curled his fingers around her delicate wrist "Something's wrong, tell me"  
She struggled to free her arm from his grip, but he was relentless Her eyes were focused on the floor "I can't. tell. YOU, Michael"  
"Why not"  
"You're a prisoner, I'm your doctor"  
"I know that"  
Her voice was cracking He tucked a stray lock of hair behind her milkywhite ear "Than stop acting like you don't"  
He pressed a soft kiss to the corner of her beautiful lips "I don't want to stop"  
a tear slipped down her cheek "I don't care what you want"  
He wiped the tear from her cheek "How about what you want"  
"It doesn't matter what I want, Michael"  
He brushed her ivory cheek.  
"And what do you want"  
"Michael"  
She wrapped her arms around his neck and held onto him as tight as she could He felt her body shaking and new she was crying He rubbed her back soothingly "Please, don't cry, it's gonna be okay"  
He felt her shake her head against his shoulder "No, it's not"  
"What makes you say that"  
"Just leave it alone, Michael"  
He pushed her away from his body gently framing her face with his hands "What's wrong"  
"I can handle it"  
"Let me help you"  
"You can't help me, It's too late"  
She turns around, he gets up behind her and pulls her into his chest "Too late for what"  
"Please, just let me go"  
He rests his head on her shoulder, pressing a geentle kiss to her temple "I love you, Sara"  
"Please, don't say that"  
She pleads with him "I. love. you"  
"I have to go"  
"I'll see you tomorrow"  
"Stay out of trouble"  
"You too" 


	2. confession

-- The Next Day -  
As Sara pulled up the privacy curtain, She heard his soft voice "Hey"

Something inside of her broke She looked at him for the first time in three weeks, in his eyes, she saw concern, for her

"Michael"  
She knew she had to tell him the truth

"I.." She knew this wasn't going to be easy

"I can't do this"

He lifted her onto the exam table And sat next to her He tilted her chin, so she'd look him in the eye As he talked to her in that soft soothing voice of his, he stroked her cheek

"Hey , It's just me, you can tell me anything"  
His touch was so gentle, he always touched her like she would break if he made the wrong move and maybe she would, maybe she would crumble at his feet "I made a mistake"  
Her voice was soft, she wasn't even sure it was audible, but he heard her, he always did

His eyes were still loving, still worried for her well being And she feared they would turn into disgust and loathing

"Whay kind of mistake"  
She closed her eyes, she couldn't tell him yet "The bad kind"

"Go on"  
"I..uhm"  
She knew she wasn't gonna make it through her confession in one piece Her thoughts were incoherent enough, the words that came out of her mouth wouldn't be any better "I.." She looked away from him, not being able to bare his eyes as she spoke her next words, knowing they'd likely hurt him, more than they did her

"...Morphine"

She could see the word sink into his brain The word that poisoned her life, was now affecting him.  
He looked at her with those eyes.

"Why did you do it?"

She wasn't sure, she could tell him the rest, the wounds were still too fresh even if she didn't think she was allowed to feel them.

She closed her eyes, the memories came flooding back She felt him, intertwine their fingers, she knew i was meant to be a comforting gesture He squeezed it to encourage her to go on

"Something happened to me a few weeks ago and I.. uhm.. I just wanted to forget about it. If only for a second"

The pad of his thumb brushed over her knuckles and it almost brought her to tears

"When did you..?"

She could still feel the tip of the needle, piercing the skin in the crook of her elbow

"6 days ago"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She tried to find the right answer, what was it that kept her from, confiding in him,  
from looking into those beautiful eyes

"I just needed one person in my life, who didn't hate me for what I was And I needed it to be you"

He stroked her cheek

"I could NEVER hate you"

His eyes were so warm and kind

"You said six days ago? I have to ask, since than have you..?"

She shut her eyes, a tear slipped down her cheek He knew this meant, she had used more than once Her eyes remained shut as she whispered her next words

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry"

He framed her face with his hand gently

"I'm not mad at you, just worried, I have been for a while now You said something happened? Can you tell me what that is?"

This was the hard part

"I.. uhm"  
How was she ever gonna get through this sentence"

"A few weeks ago.. someone.."

She took a deep breath, held it in for a moment before exhaling

"They tried to hurt me... rape me"

His jaw tightened, He dropped her hand from his grip

"What"  
His harsh words broke her strength and sent tears falling down her cheeks He put his hand on her shoulder gentlky, not to frighten her

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry"  
She knew what his next question would be, and what he would do if it was true

"Was it someone from around here"  
She shook her head "No"

"Who was it, Sara?"

"My ex-boyfriend. he..uhm.. he was in trouble, I tried to help him. I should've known"

His blue eyes focus on her hazel orbs

"This isn't your fault"  
"I know what he's like, I shouldn't 've let him get so close I should 've stayed away from him"

His jaw tightened with anger "What he's like? He's done this to you before"  
"No, not this"

His eyes were glazed over with guilt "I'm sorry"

"Why"  
"I kissed you, I touched you, I shouldn't 've done that"  
"You didn't know"  
"Still, I shouldn't have done that without your permission"

She took his hand in hers

"Michael, It's okay, you're okay, I.. I trust you"

She saw a question burning in his eyes

"You.. You said he "tried" to hurt you"  
"I hit him over the head, with an ashtray, your ashtray"

He knew she was referring to the ashtray he'd made her while he was in psychward "That's my girl"

"Thank you"  
"For what?"

"Listening to me, and you know, making me that stupid ashtray"  
She gave him a small smile, But it at least a smile, more than he'd seen from her in three weeks "Anytime. So does this mean, I need to make you a new ashtray"  
Her smile grew "No, i'm good for now"

"I've been here for awhile, I should probably get going"  
"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow"  
"Tomorrow's sunday"  
She'd never dreaded her day off quite so much "Right, Monday than"  
"I'll be here"  
"You better be" 


	3. fainting

She came back from a less than pleasant lunch with her father It was almost 2.00, time for Michael's appointment, she couldn't help but feel happy she would see him like if she saw him, heard his voice, everything would be okay her eyes were tired, glazed over with exhaustion, her muscles were soar from lack of rest she was dizzy with food deprevation and her mind wasn't focused on anything but this constant fear that was roaming around her spirit When she walked into the infirmary, she saw him standing there, waiting for her arrival A wave of relief washed over her, as she made her way to him She pulled up the privacy curtain and motioned for him to take his shirt off She put her cold hands on his warm back and absorbed his heat He turned his head so he could see her His velvety voice awoke her from her slumber "Hey"  
Her voice was a whisper "Hi"  
He got up from the exam table and moved to stand closer to her when she collapsed into his strong arms He was wondering if he should call the nurse, when she opened her eyes "Are you okay"  
"yeah"  
she pushed herself away from the comfort of his body "sara"  
"I'm just worn out okay"  
she snapped on him with a strained voice "I haven't slept for more than five minutes in three weeks!  
I can't eat and I'm scared so forgive me if I'm not too steady on my feet right now"  
her eyes grew moist and she fell into Michael's warm arms, willingly this time.  
"I'm sorry"  
He rubbed his hands up and down her lower back soothingly "I had a fight with my father and i just don't have the energy"  
"You need to sleep"  
"I can't"  
"Nightmares"  
"No, You have to fall asleep first to get those"  
"You're affraid to go to sleep"  
It was a statement not a question "I don't wanna be alone"  
"Can't you stay with someone"  
He wishes it could be him "I really don't have anyone that i'm close enough to, for that"  
no one but you, she thinks "How about your dad"  
"He thinks this is my own fault, and I should fix it by myself I'm alone in this, i'll just have to face it"  
He frames her face in his palms, looking her in the eyes lovingly "You're not alone"  
"I'm sorry michael"  
"why"  
"For being such a trainwreck, you don't need this"  
His hands still framing her beautiful features, he rests his forhead against hers "I need you, I love you"  
"Maybe you shouldn't"  
"And maybe you should let me decide"  
He hopped back up on the exam table.  
He pulled her onto his lap, where she rested her the side of her face on his bare chest He held her tiny frame tightly "I'm so tired"  
"That's to be expected don't you think"  
He started drawing lazy circles on her back "You're making me fall asleep"  
"You should sleep"  
"Not here, and not with you holding me"  
She saw his face sober up at her "not in your arms" remark "I'm not saying that's not how I wanna fall asleep but I shouldn't and I can't"  
"I know I'm sorry"  
"For what"  
"That you can't fall asleep in my arms"  
she sat up in his lap, composing herself He looked her in the eyes sweetly "You're going to get through this"  
"How can you be so sure of that"  
"Because you're strong, Sara Just being in your presence I can feel your strength"  
She shook her head, feeling anything but strong "I'm not strong"  
"Who ever it was that planted those negative thoughts in your head stop listening to them, let me be here for you, like you're always here for me"  
She glanced at the clock and he followed her gaze, he was the first to speak "It's time for me to go"  
"I know"  
She let herself slide off of his lap and made sure her legs were steady before releasing his hand from her tight grip He tucked a strand of her soft auburn hair behind her ear "Take care of yourself okay"  
"Yeah you too, stay out of trouble, don't get hurt"  
"Don't worry about me, I'll see you tomorrow"  
Like that he walked out of her infirmary leaving her a little less tired, a little more capable of getting through the day the night would be a whole other story 


	4. I need you to fight

Michael was awoken by one of the guards,  
saying that the doctor wanted to run some tests He knew something had to be wrong for her to call for him in the middle of the night when he first saw the look in her eyes, he wanted to put his arms around her, and tell her everything was gonna be alright but the guard was still there "Doc, how long are you gonna need him"  
"I'd like to keep him overnight, and you know you're fine leaving him here with me"  
"you sure"  
"yeah, thanks Lewis"  
after a small nod the guard left and they were alone

He turned to see her beautiful face,  
her eyes were fixed on a spot on the floor He tilted her chin with his fingers "Sara what's going on"  
She started fidgeting with her hands "I just.. I need.. you"  
She leaned her forehead to his chest keeping a short distance between their bodies He whispered into her ear "Did something happen"  
"No but"  
"Why are you here?  
Shouldn't you be at home by now"  
She moved to stand by the window, hugging herself "I didn't see the point, there's nothing there, just memories"  
"So you're just gonna stay here all night"  
He put his hands on her shoulders She closed her eyes at his soft touch "I feel safe here"  
"In a maximum security prison"  
He quipped She turned herself around so they were face to face "You're here"

She sat down on one of the beds in the infirmary A few tears slid down her milky white cheeks He sat down next to her, she looked at him through her blurry eyes He pulled her tiny framy close to his "Come here"  
He just held her there for a few minutes Before slowely moving their bodies to a lying down position She opened her eyes and looked up at him vulnerably He realized that after what's she'd just been through This was scaring her "I'd never hurt you"  
She nodded "I know"  
"Nothing's gonna happen, you should rest maybe this was a bad idea, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable"  
He'd already started to sit up when she took his hand and pulled him back to her "Please, don't go, I don't want you to go"  
"I'm here, i'm not going anywhere. but I don't need to be HERE,  
I could be a few feet away"  
He pointed to the chair by the bed "I'd still be close, it might be less scary"  
She held his arm tightly, her teary eyes looking up at him "No, I need you close to me, I need you to hold me.. please"  
Her bottom lip quivered Her voice was small and frail begging him not to leave her He wrapped his arms around her body gently and felt her melt into him He whispered into her ear "Just close your eyes,  
No one's gonna hurt you I'm not going anywhere"  
After only a few minutes she drifted off to sleep But he stayed awake relishing the feeling of having her in his arms

After a few hours of sleep Tears were streaming down her cheeks Her fists clenched, She started pounding on his chest He held her tiny frame close to his, he spoke into her ear "Sara, wake up"  
Her rubbed her back soothingly "It's just a nightmare, I'm right here"  
Her hazel orbs opened, She was looking at him with her vulnerable eyes "Michael"  
"I'm here, baby"  
Her chin trembled as she was still crying He softly stroke her cheek "Are you okay"  
"No, I just don't know what to do anymore,  
everything hurts so much and I just want it all to go away"  
Morphine was starting to look more and more appealing "I hate this, i can't even stop crying long enough to form a fucking sentence And I can't stop thinking about him, I feel his hands on me and there's only one thing that can make it go away"  
She got up and faced the medicine cabinet He wrapped his hands around her waist "Sara"  
"Please just let me go"  
His grip tightened Tears were still streaming down her face "No, You're not doing this Sara"  
He turned her around in his arms and lifted her onto the bed "I love you, I need you to fight"  
She gave him a small nod "I there anything I can do"  
Her arms wrapped around his torso "Please don't leave me"  
"Never"

She woke up to feel her face buried in the warm crook of his neck Their arms were around eachother and their legs were entangled She looked up to see his beautiful eyes gazing at her lovingly "Hi"  
her voice was soft "Hey"  
his was hoarse He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, kissing her gently on the cheek She gave him a smile "As much as I don't want to, I have to get up"  
He gave her a small smile and she sat up, swinging her long legs over the side of the bed She turned her head to him "Michael"  
"Yeah"  
"Thanks for last night"  
He shrugged "It was nothing"  
"It's more than what anybody's done for me in a really long time,  
If you hadn't've been here, I don't know what I would've done"  
She lowered her head "well actually I do, I would've shot up"  
He sat up behind her, putting his head on her shoulder "Hey"  
She rested her head against his and closed her eyes She turned her body around to face him She inched her face closer to his and pressed her lips to his softly He let her take control, she opened her mouth to him slightly And took his face in her hands holding him close to her her tongue found it's way into his mouth Gently brushing against his own, her movemens became more frantic as a tear slipped down her cheek He took her face in his hands and gently inched her away from him to look into her eyes, but she had her back to him She tied her hair back in a messy bun and moved toward the door He took her hand in his "I have to go"  
She tried to yank her arm free but he wouldn't let go instead he was tugging her toward him She faced him with tears in her eyes "I'm sorry, okay"  
He stroked her cheek softly with the pad of his thumb "Why are you sorry"  
"I couldn't give you"  
He framed her face with his hands, looking deeply into her hazel eyes "That's not what I want, That's not what we're about"  
She looked down and than back up into his eyes "Than why are you here"  
"Because I love you and I will do anything to see you smile again,  
I just want you to feel safe"  
"with you I do feel safe"  
She planted a soft kiss on his cheek and looked at him with fear of rejection in her eyes "That's all I can give you right now. okay"  
He pressed his lips to her forehead "I love you" 


End file.
